Happiness

The BLAME Game

| Hilda

the blame game

Ooh that sounds to be one of our favorite game. Yeah because we can consider ourselves as a winner.

“Fair play is primarily not blaming others for anything that is wrong with us” – Eric Hoffer

The blame game means declaring someone or something responsible for a fault or wrong. This game has been responsible for massive fights, frustration and unhappiness in our human society.

This article shares our insights on Reasons for Blaming, Why should we stop it?, and how can we stop doing it?

Why Do We Blame?

Blaming is quite common but understanding the reasons behind it may help us to deal with it.

  1. Fear to Admit

In our society mistakes are considered as failures. And if you are a failure you will be disrespected. This fear of failure and disrespect will never allow you to admit your mistake and it is more likely to put the blame on others.

  1. Social Ranking

In the society Blaming makes you relatively more good than the person you blame. You win in the “social comparison” method of social ranking. “If the other person is at fault I am comparatively better than him”.

  1. Control

Many a times people try to take control over others by blaming them. They may not only aim to make other realize their mistake but also tag them as unproductive, selfish etc. so that they may direct the culprit to do something in their favor.

  1. Restore

Sometimes we are terrified with the situation. We are angry, panic, helpless and disturbed. At this time, we find blaming a solution to restore ourselves.

  1. Learn

Blaming is contagious. We often learn to play this game from others. For e.g. A child watching his parents fighting and blaming one other for the situation, an employer blaming his employee etc. Ultimately, we are not taught to take responsibility.

  1. Confusion

When a person does something wrong we confuse ‘the deed with the doer’ which makes the person feel less worthy of respect. We say ‘You as a person have failed’ instead of just ‘What you did was wrong’.

Why should we stop Blaming?

You never win in this game. In fact, research shows that the people who blame others learn less and perform worse in comparison to people who own up their mistakes and responsibilities.

When you blame you are running away from your feedback which is an obstacle for your personal growth.

Blaming traps, you into irresponsibility, avoidance and fear.

Ask yourself “If the other person is responsible for your failure, is he also responsible for your success”?

the blame game

How can we stop playing the Blame game?

  • We humans are imperfect and instead of fearing from our mistakes we need to focus on learning and move on. “We are defined not by our mistakes but by the way we correct them”.
  • When an unexpected situation occurs try to analyze the situation and think of ‘What to do next to resolve it’
  • Speak to a person whom you think is really responsible for the situation to help him learn from his mistake and not humiliate him.
  • Accept your mistake and responsibility which can create a good example for your followers and stop the blame game from emerging.
  • Pour out yourself by honestly interacting with people who can help you to correct your mistake.
  • Accept the fact by breaking the wall of ‘I am right’ and ‘You are wrong’.
  • We all make some poor choices in life and so when someone does something wrong it doesn’t mean that he is a bad person as whole or deserves less respect.
Accept that you live in an imperfect world where mistakes are bound to happen by you and others as well.
So Try to make things better and Stop Blaming others for it.

 

Parenting

Avoid the Blue Whale Challenge Suicidal game

| Hilda

depression

Depression and anxiety are the serious issues faced in society. It is said ‘When you are depressed you don’t control your thoughts, your thoughts control you.’ This is very well understood by the results of the game called “Blue Whale Challenge a Suicidal Game”.

This game has led to many suicidal deaths all over the world.

This article is to make you aware of the game and its consequences to ensure safety of your loved ones because Life is Beautiful with your loved ones.

“Blue Whale suicide game “, is an internet game which exist in more than 19 countries which include USA and India as well. The game assigns a series of tasks to players by administrators during a 50-day period, with the final challenge of committing suicide.

It began in Russia in 2013 with “F57”, on VKontakte social network, and allegedly caused its first suicide in 2015. Philipp Budeikin, a former psychology student who was restricted from his university, claimed that he invented the game.

Also note that this game is not downloadable, application or any software It is a social media phenomenon which enters social media networks from secretive groups.

About the blue whale challenge a suicidal game

Below are the challenges which users has to accept after accessing this game which gets tougher with each day passing and duration to complete all task is 50 days.

  1. Carve a specific phrase on the person’s own hand or arm.
  2. Wake up at 4:20 a.m. and watch a scary video (sent by the curator.)
  3. Make lengthwise cuts on the person’s own arm.
  4. Draw a whale on a piece of paper
  5. Write “yes” on the person’s own leg if ready to be a whale. Otherwise, they should cut themselves multiple times.
  6. Secret task (written in code.)
  7. Scratch (a message) on the person’s own arm.
  8. Write a status online about being a whale.
  9. Overcome a fear.
  10. Get up at 4:20 and go to the roof.
  11. Carve a whale on the person’s own hand.
  12. Watch scary videos all day.
  13. Listen to music the “curator” sends.
  14. Cut your lip.
  15. Poke the person’s own arm/hand with a needle.
  16. Make yourself hurt or sick.
  17. Go to a roof and stand on the edge.
  18. Stand on a bridge.
  19. Climb a crane.
  20. At this step, the “curator” somehow checks to see if the participant is trustworthy.
  21. Talk with a “whale” on Skype.
  22. Sit down on a roof with legs dangling over the edge.
  23. Another job that is in code.
  24. A secret mission
  25. Meet with a “whale”.
  26. The “curator” assigns a date that the person will die.
  27. Visit a railroad.
  28. Do not talk with anyone all day.
  29. Give an oath/vow about being a whale
  30. After these steps, steps 30-49 involve watching horror movies and listening to music that the curator picks, talking to a whale, and making cuts.
  31. The last task is jumping off a building.

Government of India has directed several Internet companies to remove links which direct users to the game. But it is available in other names as well. So If you report any unusual behavior of a person around you it’s time for you to act and save them.

Growing up a child itself is a challenge and to keep them away from all these temptation is bigger task as this generation is becoming techno savvy. But Remember “Smartphones cannot be a substitute for parenting”.